Sunday, February 15, 2009

No Rolls Are Better Than Shitty Rolls


Isaac and Jeff Banks in Europe with A18

Ike returns after some time off, and gives a funny tale from the Chorus days - enjoy.
-Gordo DCXX

Recruiting for your band can be a daunting process. How bad do you want to play shows? How good does he or she have to be? Should all the members share the same views? Do they have good gear? I think most bands start with a guy who wants to sing who is friends with a guitar player, at least that's been the case with every band I have done. Hardest member to come by is the ever-elusive kick ass drummer. I think most band nerds will agree that the drummer MUST shred. Or, well...SHOULD shred. Ok… It would be nice if they were sorta good but had heart.

In the early days of The Chorus me and Banks thought that we might pull the 'mysterious project band' card, do a pissed off record and be semi elusive just to cause controversy. We realized very soon that there was just no way we could do that. Banks' time in Visual Discrimination was at an end, Chorus songs were recorded, we needed dudes…. Fast! There was never a doubt about Regis. He was our one and only choice, we knew he was going to be an important element even as Banks and I recorded the LP. He was in this band before he even agreed, period. But we were at a loss regarding a drummer, we had no clue.

We both adhered to the one band at a time creed so finding a guy already doing something was simply out of the question. We tossed some names around just the same thinking we could steal them outright, or is that 'kidnap' them outright? Neal from Hard Stance? No, not a very good fit. Casey Jones from No For An Answer? No, the hand-cuff drum style would not satisfy Banks. We even thought we might heist Bratton and Frosty from Chain of Strength to round out our powerhouse. But to no avail, we were just talking out loud and needed to get serious, then Banks suggested someone I couldn't believe. He says, "I know this kid in my class, that might do it. His name is Jerry." I thought nothing of the name, until he told me what he had done previous. "He was in Grudge," he says dryly. I paused so as not to upset an already stressful drummerless situation. "You mean the joke band, make fun of straight edge, we pull someone out of the crowd to do a milk bong instead of a beer bong at our live shows Grudge?" I asked. Banks looked me in the eye without a blink and gave me the patented side smirk-bite his bottom lip-with two nods. I smiled knowing EXACTLY what that meant and said, "Slammy?" He said, "We'll claim it as a victory if anyone asks." I said, "Word is born, I'm in!!!"


Jerry Hohman supplying the Chorus beat

So Banks set it up. I was to come up to Cerritos right before his class and accompany him to his afternoon class, then scoop up Jerry and head to Carl's Jr. I met Jerry. Very unassuming, skinny, sorta shy dude, no attitude whatsoever. We are about to pull a 3 in the cab trip to Carl's, but before we even pull out of the parking spot Banks slides in The Chorus tape, pulls his ever present drum sticks from between the seats, and begins to kick beats along to the tape. Steering wheel: high hat. Horn cover: snare. Light tap on the brake pedal: bass drum. Cerritos parking pass hanging from the rearview: crash cymbal. Jerry is coyly sitting bitch while Banks pounds away, and at 100% volume, I sing along to my voice, while the stock speakers try their best to not crumble. It's quite a scene.

Just as quick as Banks began, he stopped, calmly turned the volume down, looked at Hohman and inquired, "Well, what do you think?" Jerry, still unphased by our antics paused and lifted his head eerily slow and said, "Yea, I can beef that up." FUCK!!! That was a perfect answer and EXACTLY what I wanted to hear. As far as I was concerned Jerry Hohman was in, and I think Jerry thought the same thing. But Banks has a way of bringing you back down to Earth and then cutting you down to size as soon as you land, it's a talent. And in that moment Banks takes off his glasses for a quick clean, puts the drum sticks back, checks his blind spots and slowly backs out and onto the road. At the first stop light Banks turns to Hohman, looks him accusingly in the eye and says, "Just remember...no rolls are better than shitty rolls."


Jeff Banks doing the Suicidal

36 comments:

'Bridge Crew said...

This is hillarious! I always wondered what happened to the guys from Grudge. Final comment had me in stitches and I spilled hot chocolate all over my keyboard!

Ben Edge said...

Banks - nothing but love for that guy.

Anonymous said...

ok, what does "No Rolls Are Better Than Shitty Rolls" even mean?

great story by the way, i love chorus

Anonymous said...

'hand-cuff drum style'.

Anonymous said...

"ok, what does "No Rolls Are Better Than Shitty Rolls" even mean?"

umm, drum rolls.

Anonymous said...

do you think it bums Issak-Issac-Isick-Isaac out that no one spells his name right? Not even DxC.

Is it that hard?

Ben--- Why only love for Banks? No love for Isaac too, didnt that dude take you to Europe? Have you gone since? Curious.

Anonymous said...

uhh douche, where did they spell his name wrong? "isaac"...i don't see it misspelled by anyone.

Anonymous said...

I had no idea until I read this that Jerry from Chorus is/was Slammy from Grudge. Very cool.

Banks nugget from '93 - Chorus are about to play a show at Mission Inn and Regis is in need of a bass. Regis politely asks the Mission Inn people to get him a bass. Not happening. Finally, Banks gets on the mic and yells, "WHAT ARE YOU, FUCKING DEAF? REGIS NEED A BASS!". Within seconds, Regis has a bass.

God love ya, Banks. You too, Issac.

Anonymous said...

uhhh, doucheier?

look under one of the pictures.

yea.

Anonymous said...

OHHHHHHHHHHHH They fixed it....

Guess THAT anoyn. guy worked on staff

It was wrong earlier.

Cant prove it now. My credit is worthless.

Isaac Golub said...

Where is the Mission Inn, and where was I for this show?

Anonymous said...

The Inland Empire. I believe Triggerman played as well. Another memory I have of that place is some old dude covered with tattoos told Sabbatini not to get tatted on his hands or face.

Anonymous said...

Here's a great story about the XCHORUSX...

'93, I think... club 8 1/2 in Fullerton while XCHORUSX was on stage I had to take a piss. On my way to the bathroom I saw 3-4 skinhead type guys pile out of there fuckin' with Jason Hampton, who I think played guitar in Blackspot that night. Regis was the first motherfucker who jumped off the stage and XCHORUSX, along with probably Matt Enright and Greg Brown beat those fuckers into the planters out in front of the place. I don't remember if the show got shut down or not but their set was cut way short. I don't recall anyone even remotely skinhead like ever showing up at 8 1/2 again.

Anonymous said...

I remember that 8 1/2 show. Lots of great shows happened there in '93. Chorus did a show there that summer where they had Tim from Visual Discrimination and Sabbatini join 'em on stage to perform songs by their respective bands. The very first Ignite show with Joe Nelson on vocals was there that year as well.

Less than a year later, I'd be deep into my KISS phase and I went to see the KISS tribute band Parasite play there.

Anonymous said...

Jake, I was at that Ignite show too, but I can't remember who else played. The "Joe era" was golden. I'd love to get my hands on a copy of that demo again. The stuff with Randy on vocals was great too, but Ignite jumped the shark after Foster and Casey left.

Anonymous said...

Coldwater Crane (which I believe evolved into Whirlpool) opened and Farside headlined. That's all I remember.

Hey Nez, it might have been called the Live Oak Inn come to think of it.

SFader said...

Justin- The Hampton fight was at 8 1/2, but Blackspot didn't play that show. (the only show Hampton played with us was there though on a different night)
Jake, It was Chorus and Cold Water crane. I just asked Hampton cuz I couldn't remember.
Isaac, I do remember thinking at the time, "WTF!!? Mr Ugly Stick is letting Grudge in the band??!" hahahahaha
Also your boy Jake didn't even spell it right.

SFader said...

Oh yeah I don't think the show got shut down, but Lohman did have to drive Hampton to the hospital. The fight started as Jason by himself against the skins in the bathroom.

Anonymous said...

The only thing I remember about that skinhead brawl at 8 1/2 was Ike's last words to the crowd - "they're crackin' skulls".

Isaac Golub said...

That fight was epic, for the most part Regis took on the entire "Tri County Skins" single handed as I remember it. I hit one skin so hard I think his grandchildren will still feel it. He got as far as yelling WHITE PO..... and it was rock-a-bye baby.

The melee poured out into the parking lot where my cherry 68 Lincoln Continental was parked in front and the fight was heading right for it, I started shoving dudes and moving the fight best I could away from my car named Sylvia. Luckily the skins were running scared and got chased up the block, like the pussies they were.

For the record Hampton was in The Chorus for one show maybe 2.

Isaac Golub said...
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Isaac Golub said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Preaching to the choir at this point but Regis is one tough mofo. I remember Evan and I were hanging out with the Chorus guys and Shepard one night and we went to go eat at a Denny's in H.B. We saw through one of the windows that there were some WP skins there and before I could blink, Regis was standing toe to toe with one of 'em in front of the cash register. The Denny's people immediately called the police, so nothing wound up happening. Regis was chomping at the bit to tear the skinhead a new asshole for a good hour afterwards though.

Anonymous said...

I saw Regis DESTROY some poor skinhead who decided to try to pick a fight with him at the Showcase. Dude's face looked like uncooked bacon after the fight.

Anonymous said...

Is it true Regis split some Jocko Homo's lip all the way up to his nose in SF?

I heard a story that some pretty boy jock was throwing elbows at a basketball game and Regis finally got fed up and sent the kid away bleeding, crying, and in need of stitches.

Anyone?

Isaac Golub said...

Yes it's very true.

We were waiting to play winners and there was some tool with his shirt off with that 'daddy love me-please someone notice me' sense of urgency look on his face. I was giving Regis an 'are you fucking ready man' fake massage, and dude came strollin' by flipping his hair saying, "Look, that guys getting a massage..." with all the sarcasm he could muster. I expected more out of a gay friendly city like SF but he was fully homophobe even at the thought of a fake massage. So next stroll by I says, "Look, there's the first guy that's gonna get his ass kicked today." Sure enough that dude throws one to many elbows Reggies way (after a few warnings) and Reggie clocks the dude once and it's Pretty Boy Gets a Scar City!!! They end up on the ground and the dude gives up beaten and bloody, he tried to shake Regis' hand and was saying, "Ok dude, you won..." I don't think Regis shook his hand and the cute college boy tip toed away not so cute anymore, with even less to say.

While the game continued I lurked over to the parking lot and saw the dude actually crying and looking in his car mirror, his buddy was saying, "Yea it's bad... you're gonna need stitches, lets go."

Anonymous said...

Another Banks AND Regis nugget from ’91 (and because I don’t want to wear out my welcome, this will probably be the last one for a while)…

ICE was playing a show at someone’s house in Costa Mesa and I was filming ‘em as usual. They came to their last song, which in those days was a cover of DYS’s “No Pain No Gain” (naturally, as Half Off’s Vadim Rubin was ICE’s drummer at the time). I turned around and asked the first guy I saw (Banks) if he could take over filming so I could go up front and scream along with all the kids. Banks generously obliged, of course. However, rather than filming ICE, he turned the video camera towards himself and nodded along to the song with a trademark pissed off hardcore look on his face. He then handed the camera over to Regis, who proceeded to do the same. Regis handed it back to Banks, who turned it to both of them. This continued for the entire song. After ICE finished, Banks and a bunch of other guys there did a very faithful rendition of the Cro-Mags’ “We Gotta Know”. Needless to say, I kept the camera on THEM the entire time.

Anonymous said...

this = queercore.

Anonymous said...

Why does Jake Jacobs ruin everything?

Anonymous said...

Jeff Banks is the most handsome man in HC

Anonymous said...

Wow Jake, what a really great story.

Anonymous said...

FU guy (a.k.a. Anonymous) is clearly still butthurt over getting his head handed to him by Nelson.

Anonymous said...

Oops, almost forgot...

CHAAAAAKKKKKAAAAA KHAAAAAAAANNNN!

Anonymous said...

Jake Jacobs why do you post as this Turd Furgeson guy, as well as other anonymous entries? Seriously you must take up 75 - 80% of the total comments on this site. Get a life man.

Anonymous said...

It was late December '93. Farside, Ignite, XChorusX, Drift Again, Cold Water Crane.

One of the last hardcore shows as "Club 8 1/2". Would later become "Club 369".

Anonymous said...

Honey, get your fat ass off the damn computer and come watch Desperate Housewives with me.